shambles...

Day 3 – Gauchos

Grote Markt 33, 4811 XP Breda

 

Foreword – I should start this entry by explaining what happened in the build-up. We were going to eat here on the first night but changed it to Los Toros. We should have been eating in Block 62, however it was about 21:45 by the time we got there and the kitchen had closed. Annoying. Then we were running around trying to find somewhere still serving (now 22:00). Luckily Gauchos were still cooking.

First Impressions – Relief that we were eating something that wasn't going to be cut off a hanging piece of offal. There were a few people still seated as we entered and during the walk to our table I scouted out what they were eating for some inspiration - it all looked very nice.

Interior – Quite slick. There were sort of cave drawings on the walls of cows, most of the seats and stools were upholstered in cow hide - they looked really cool. The bar and serving counters were all brushed stainless steel. I remember thinking I wouldn't mind my living room looking like this, which is high praise indeed.

I wouldn't swap my Liam Gallagher canvas for a picture of a cow though.

 

Service – There isn't too much to say here. The waitress was blonde, friendly and smiley. Asked if we would like some bread, but failed to tell us that it would add €4 to the bill. I asked her what 'Churrasco de Cuadril' was, she told me it was thin cuts of rump steak, marinated, and topped with garlic and parsley. It was all correct apart from the "thin cuts" bit - it was pure slabbage. They also took ages to collect the bill, at one point my co-eater was quite annoyed and said to himself, "just take the money and end it!" Which gives you a bit of a clue as to how the next passage will read.

Food – €25 + €7 (side dishes) – I have thought long and hard about what I'm going to write here. Maybe the level of the previous meals has made me slightly more critical of lesser dishes? Therefore I thought about how I would write this passage had this been day one. I would have written it as follows;

I ordered Churrasco de Cuadril. The waitress asked me what side dishes I wanted, I panicked and asked for grilled seasonal vegetables, and tagliatelle with tomato salsa. After she left I realised I was subconsciously trying to chase yesterday's dinner by ordering pasta with steak. I half got up to change the pasta to something else but decided against it. I wish I had. The steak was very well cooked, I would say perfectly cooked again, but the cut of the meat wasn't really flavourful - it was all a bit flat. Maybe that's why they try and flog you a sauce to go on top of it, (I don't know why you'd want sauce if something already has garlic and parsley on it?). Anyway I don't think the chef could have done much better with the piece of meat he was working with, so I can't really complain about that. What I can complain about is the absolute disgrace of the pasta side dish - I'm getting angry. The pasta was overcooked. That's annoying to begin with. Secondly, the 'Tomato Salsa' was appalling! If you shut your eyes you would think you were eating own brand spaghetti hoops. It was sh*t to be honest - I cannot find the right word to describe it better. Tasted like someone had put a sweetener in it too *shakes head*. The grilled seasonal vegetables were a pair of grilled bell peppers, they were just that, everyone knows what they taste like. I wasn't impressed with this experience at all.

I will also point out that my co-eater had ordered ribs, (he also made a snap panic decision), they were bottomless ribs too and I tried a couple. These are the same ribs I talk about eating in England on Day 1's entry, and the reason I won't order them. Tasted pre-cooked and then flashed on the grill, also tasted processed, texture was all wrong, and the barbeque sauce was an abomination. A-BOM-IN-A-TION. He was also complaining that his fingers stunk of old cheap pig for some time after. And they charged €1 for a pot of mayonaisse.
 

 

 

Final Thought – I can't even be bothered to have one really. If I have to waste any more time typing about Gauchos Breda, I shall say this;

No love went into any of these dishes. Always be careful about eating anywhere located on the main square. I will never return to this restaurant. The steak we had at Los Toros pisses all over this place.

Fin.